What is a Red flag or Green Flag?
In relationships
This is not relationship advice, as I’m no expert at it. I don’t think anyone in the world is an expert in relationships. As every human being is different so is every relationship.
There are three people I would go to when I have to rethink my relationship;
Sudha Murthy, wife of Narayana Murthy the ex-CEO of Infosys. She is not just a mother, grandmother, and mother-in-law, but also a philanthropist and an author. Most of the books she has written are in very simple English and can be understood by anyone. I have personally heard her speeches, they are very relatable and simple. And her take on relationships is something I admire the most. Her mantra for a peaceful life is simple yet people struggle. In today's world where women think a man should do everything for them, she says that a marriage or relationship only works when two people work on it. Having space, being level-minded, and not getting influenced by others' life is what I have taken away from her advice.
Sadhguru is a person who wants to teach the capitalist world how to live a peaceful life. He is not only the founder of Isha Yoga but also a philanthropist and an author. His course on “inner engineering” has helped a lot of people to understand life. I have heard people who have taken the course cope with anger issues, health, and mental health, and find balance in life. Even though he is called a misogynist for gender roles. I would still consider his advice over any feminist’s advice in the world. The reason is simple, as women we can only do certain things and so are men, but what we can do to each other grow is enormous. And that is what Sadhguru says, he says marriage is not a competition or a compromise between two people but it's a beautiful arrangement in that a man and a woman agree to live for each other cook for each other, and help each other grow in every aspect of life.
My mother is a woman who was raised by two greatest single women in her life. My grandmother and my great-grandmother both lost their husbands at very young ages and in the world they lived re-marriage was not a thing. Hence, she was raised alone and strong-minded. The one piece of advice I got from my grandmother was a woman should always be finically independent, which is how my mother raised a family. She was not only helping my dad build a family but she was independent, she loved to travel and eat and enjoy new places. And this never stopped her from being the wife and mother is even today. The one and true relationship advice she gave me was to be calm and composed at all times. Doesn’t matter if it's a fight or a decision that has to be taken for the family, just be calm and things will come to you. Have patience with the man who lives with you no matter how much of a frustrating day you had.
